‘Parenting Faithfully’ In the Digital Age: Book Encourages Parents To Be Proactive
(REVIEW) What can we do about the iPad kids?
Children’s constant attachment to their screens — and how that behavior impacts their mental health and development — is an issue of much consternation for parents today, and one that’s virtually impossible to avoid or ignore.
“Connected: Parenting Faithfully in the Digital Age” looks to equip parents to combat the ill effects of unlimited digital access — centered around a God-seeking family life.
Author Joe Wells, a Gen X father of four, cites research that shows nearly half of 2- to 4-year-olds have their own tablet and that teenagers, on average, spend 9 hours on screens daily for entertainment alone — not including school activities.
He addresses not only screen time and addiction but also immediate physical and emotional threats and immoral content that young children and teens can face through their digital devices.
For example, Wells talks about bullying, sexting and the need for validation — even pornography and child predators.
Many of these dangers are not new, but with texting and social media, they are ever-present and can affect children even inside the apparent safety of their homes. Wells mentions specific apps parents should be on the lookout for.
He notes that God created us with an innate desire to be connected, but we sometimes fulfill that need in unhealthy ways.
To protect our children, Wells says, we must take a proactive and committed role in our children’s digital lives: “You cannot approach it with … laziness.”
The author offers seven guiding principles for parenting in the digital age: educate yourself, set boundaries, promote open communication, model responsible use, focus on the heart, stay informed and pray together.
I appreciate Wells’ holistic method: While he offers ways to monitor and block unwanted internet usage, he also describes the importance of instilling in our children a desire to do the right thing and building the kind of relationships where they feel comfortable coming to us for help.
A digital plan built solely on putting up roadblocks will fail. Children will find ways around them.
“In parenting faithfully, it’s not just us making demands — it’s us trying to win the hearts of our children,” Wells writes.
He also notes the importance of leadership and setting an example for technology use.
I find myself particularly convicted on that front, as I try to avoid screen time for my almost 2-year-old while struggling to put the phone down myself as a younger millennial.
The book is not without its faults. Wells seems to demonstrate flawed understandings of some apps and technical concepts, such as DNS. And I think some of his generational biases (which he admits can skew our perceptions) come through on topics like video games.
But overall, “Connected” is a valuable crash course on the challenges kids face through their screens and how we can help our children navigate them with godly leadership.
There are some thought-provoking ideas here for Christian parents of all ages and technology levels.
This article was originally published in The Christian Chronicle.
Calvin Cockrell is Managing Editor of The Christian Chronicle. Contact calvin@christianchronicle.org.