From Super Bowl-winning Chaplain To Unique Ministry As ‘Life Coach’
For 14 seasons, the Rev. Rod Hairston served as a chaplain for the Baltimore Ravens, where he helped the NFL franchise build a winning culture among the front office executives, coaches and players.
But after two Super Bowl rings and serving as a sports chaplain from Howard University to UCLA, Hairston, 57, is a “life coach,” working with couples, writing books and pastoring at Messiah Community Church in Reisterstown, Maryland.
Sporting a burgundy blazer, casual shirt and tennis shoes, reverend is a title that just didn't fit Hairston as he moved around on a stage without a podium to start a series of lessons called “Bold Love.”
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He recently left Baltimore County and headed down to Florida, along with his wife, where was the keynote speaker for a dinner for about 200 NFL players and their wives. Moments after he got back, he was on the phone talking about his unique ministry.
“Life coach is a better title than counselor because it includes therapy and theology and that is more biblically sound,” said Hairston, who started his sermon series the second Sunday in February.
Hairston is married to Sheri, his wife of 32 years and the mother of their four children.
“We keep a very firm rhythm on our love life and the time we spend together to nurture our relationship,” he said. “You have to have a powerful rhythm to have a strong marriage.”
During the first sermon in the series, Hairston preached, “Just because you don't have a boo doesn't mean that you don't need to practice your love game.”
Asked about balancing family and ministry, Hairston said, “I will not put my wife and family on the alter. Jesus died for the church. He didn't need me to die for him. He didn't give me the church to die for it.”
The Rev. Rod Hairston is married to Sheri, his wife of 32 years and mother of their four children. (Photo courtesy of Rod Hairston)
But those comments don’t mean that Sheri doesn't often join him in the ministry. Last month, she joined him at a dinner where he spoke at a dinner for NFL players and their wives in Florida.
Hairston has also released two books called “Cover Her” and “Cover Him.”
“‘Cover Him’ is a practical guide for understanding what men often need, think, and feel but rarely express with words,” Hairston said. “‘Cover Her’ has a special message for men to share with the woman in their lives.”
Hairston said women need to hear words of affirmation such as, “I will cover you, no matter what it takes. You can count on me to watch over your physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being,”
Today, Hairston’s ministry is centered around three principles: A passion for God, a passion for his family and a passion to see men and women succeed.
“You can't do very stressful work without addressing the stress and relationships that affect your work,” he said. “At UCLA, I lead Bible studies for athletes and couples.”
After 16 seasons with the Baltimore Ravens, outside Linebacker Terrell Suggs, a seven-time Pro Bowler, made the decision to leave the team to take care of his terminally-ill mother. Hairston is seen here in prayer with Suggs. (Photo via the Baltimore Ravens/courtesy of Rod Hairston)
But then one day he got a call saying that there was an opening for a chaplain position in Baltimore and his response was, “What team?”
Hairston said he was shocked to know it was the Baltimore Ravens. He said his 14 years with the Ravens went “beyond my wildest dreams. … What I did on the sidelines and in the locker room transferred seamlessly to other environments.”
“Every year that we had strong couples ministry we won two Super Bowls,” he added.
But the pastor said one of his biggest challenges is helping players deal with unresolved childhood trauma.
“That is the source of a lot of conflict. I have developed a six-step plan for conflict and by helping couples see where the conflict is,” he said. “I work with people who are public but privately in a lot of trouble and pain but I respect their privacy. I don't publicize who I work with.”
Hairston added: “I have a deep concern about people’s spiritual health, relationship health, and emotional health. The Bible has much to say about it. I believe in the intersection between great theology and great psychology.”
The Rev. Rod Hairston shows off the two Super Bowl rings he was awarded as Baltimore Ravens chaplain. (Photo courtesy of Rod Hairston)
Hairston now shares the wisdom and insights he gained from those years in pro sports as he speaks in a variety of settings, including NCAA events, corporate seminars, retreats, churches and conferences.
In endorsing his book “Cover Her,” Ravens head coach John Harbaugh wrote, “Rod Hairston is a tremendously effective communicator and an inspirational leader. He’s had an amazing impact on our football team, our coaching staff, and really, everybody associated with our program.”
In 2005, Hairston founded Messiah Community Church, a vibrant faith community. Hariston said in a recent sermon, “How do we love God with our worship, then added, “Bold love and bold worship go together.”
During the sermon, he started singing the Bee Gees 1977 hit, “How Deep is Your Love.”
“Cause we’re living in a world of fools,” Hairston sang, pretending to slow dance.
Then he stopped, turned around and asked those sitting in the pews, “The question is how bold is your love?”
Hamil R. Harris is a veteran journalist and Religion Unplugged correspondent based in Washington, D.C.